Beautiful
by J.M. Bowers
Summary: When Beast Boy decides on a Karaoke Night for the Titans, Raven is less than thrilled - especailly when BB steps up to the mic. But the song he has planned may mean more to the girl than she realizes... SongFic with BB/Rae!


This is my first attempt at a Song Fic. Please R&R, regardless of what you think of it. All critism welcome in my house.

* * *

Lyrics for the song "Beautiful" written by Marshall Mathers III

* * *

"You know, this is probably the dumbest idea you've ever had," Raven said as Beast Boy busied himself trying to untangle all the wires leading to and from the small machine.

"I disagree," Starfire said, brightly. "I find it somewhat interesting that humans find entertainment in singing established vocals off-key."

"If you can call that 'entertainment'," the sorceress said, glumly.

"I think it's a rather interesting idea," Robin said, his hands on his hips. "Where'd you find that karaoke machine anyway, BB?"

"Got it from the local bar," the shape-shifter said, finally getting the mess of wires in order. "They were going to get rid of it, so I asked them if I could take it."

"You know the reason that they were trashing it was because nobody with a brain wants to sing karaoke anymore, right?" Raven said, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Not true!" BB said, defiantly. "I like singing karaoke!"

"I rest my case," the Titan said, smirking.

"FYI, you don't have to sing, you know," Beast Boy said, handing the A/V cables to Cyborg so he could plug them into the back of the big screen TV. "Doesn't mean the rest of us can't have some fun."

"Fine," Raven said, turning her back to the Titans. "I'll be in my room with cotton stuffed in my ears."

As the girl started for the hallway, she felt a hand grab her shoulder. Looking back, she noticed Starfire looking at her.

"Please stay, Raven," the Tamaranean said, a small smile on her face. "You never seem interested in joining us for merry-making activities. If you do not wish to sing, at least enjoy the company of your friends."

Raven let out a long sight. This was going to be a long night.

* * *

The Titans breathed a sigh of relief as Starfire finished her set strong. Robin's ears were ringing from the girl's vocal range, which had ranged from ear-splitting to glass-shattering.

'Well, there goes another two windows,' he said as he slowly regained his hearing. 'Glad I got the warranty the last time.'

"Well, that was…memorable," Cyborg said, shaking his head.

Raven groaned from under her hood, which had been pulled tightly over her head. "I used to like that song," she muttered. "So much for that now."

"Come on, it wasn't that bad," Beast Boy said, grinning. "No worse than Cy's rendition of 'We Are the Champions'."

"That's debatable," the girl said, frowning as she recalled the mechanical man's tone-deaf cover. That kid from American Idol had been more tolerable. So far, Robin's rendition of the classic rock song "Sweet Home Alabama" had been the best of the team's efforts. As far as Raven was concerned, Starfire had just butchered the song 'One of Us' with a style that was almost admirable if it hadn't been so terribly bad.

"Well, I guess if Rae's not singing, that leaves us with Beast Boy," Robin said, grinning.

Raven's eyes went wild. "Okay, that's enough," she said, getting up from the couch. "I've been tortured enough for one night."

"Come on, Rae," Cyborg said, looking at her. "I'm sure it won't be that bad."

"Indeed," Starfire added, grinning. "At least Beast Boy may know the lyrics to his song."

"That's what I'm afraid of," the girl said, walking around the furniture and heading for the hallway.

"Please, Raven," Robin said, rather dejected. "Just give him a chance."

"Sorry," the Titan said, "but if his singing is anything like his poetry, it just might drive me insane."

Realizing what she had said, she slowly looked back at the front of the living room. Beast Boy stood there with the microphone in his hand and a sad look on his face. Those words had been a little harsher than she had wanted.

"Look, I'm sorry I said that," she muttered. "I didn't mean it like that."

Raven kicked herself mentally. Once again, she had said something that came out the wrong way. That's why she usually kept to herself – to prevent situations like this from arising. Perhaps it was time for her to leave for the sanctity of her room.

As she stepped out into the hallway, she heard Beast Boy call her name. Turning around, she saw him looking at her, a sad smile on his face.

"This song's for you," he said, quietly.

The girl grimaced. Chances are it would be some punk rock song from a band like Green Day or Blink-182. Too merry and infantile for her liking. Slowly, she continued her way down the hall. It was when she reached the door that the sound came to her.

It was BB's voice, slightly strained but surprisingly in key with the music backing the lyrics. It reverberated in the hallway. Looks like he had turned up the speakers to make sure she would hear it. Closing her eyes, she listened to the melody:

_Lately I've been hard to reach  
__I've been too long on my own  
__Everybody has a private world  
__Where they can be alone  
__Are you calling me?  
__Are you trying to get through?  
__Are you reaching out for me?  
__I'm reaching out for you…_

The lyrics seemed to pull at Raven's heartstrings. Whatever it was in those words was drawing her back into the room. Slowly, she peeked back out into the living room. Beast Boy was there, the Titans staring at him. They had never heard him sing before. It wasn't amazing, but much better than they had expected.

Suddenly, the Titan began bobbing his head as the drum beat came in. This was a surprise to his friends – this wasn't a regular song. This was a rap.

BB's lips began moving quickly as the words came out like a machine gun. None of them expected him to have the skill to keep up with the speed of the machine, but the words came just the same:

_I'm just so fucking depressed, I just can't seem to get out this slump  
__If I could just get over this hump, but I need something to pull me out this dump  
__I took my bruises, took my lumps, fell down and I got right back up  
__But I need that spark to get psyched back up, in order for me to pick the mic back up  
__I don't know how or why or when, I ended up in this position I'm in  
__I'm startin' to feel distant again, so I decided to just pick this pen  
__Up to try to make an attempt to vent, but I just can't admit  
__Or come to grips with the fact that I may be done with rap, I need a new outlet  
__And I know some shits so hard to swallow, but I just can't sit back and wallow  
__In my own sorrow, but I know one fact, I'll be one tough act to follow  
__One tough act to follow, I'll be one tough act to follow  
__Here today, gone tomorrow, but you got to walk a thousand miles_

At this moment, BB's eyes locked with Raven's as she stood in the doorway. A smile came to his face as he pointed at her, directing the words towards his friend:

_In my shoes, just to see, what it's like to be me  
__I'll be you, let's trade shoes, just to see what it'd be like to  
__Feel your pain, you feel mine, go inside each others minds  
__Just to see, what we find, look at shit through each others eyes  
__But don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you  
__Don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you_

The depth of the lyrics were resonating him the gothic Titan. She had never seen Beast Boy bare his soul like this. True, it may have been someone else's words, but they fit him so well…

_I think I'm starting to lose my sense of humor  
__Everything's so tense and gloom, I  
__Almost feel like I gotta check the temperature of the room  
__Just as soon as I walk in, it's like all eyes on me, so I try to avoid any eye contact  
__Cause if I do that it then it opens the door for conversation, like I want that  
__I'm not looking for extra attention, I just wanna be just like you  
__Blend in with the rest of the room, maybe just point me to the closest restroom  
__I don't need no fuckin' man servant, tryna follow me around and wipe my ass  
__Laugh at every single joke I crack, and half of them ain't even funny, like "AAHHHHH!  
__Marshall, you're so funny man, you should be a comedian, god damn!"  
__Unfortunately I am, I just hide behind the tears of a clown  
__So why don't you all sit down, listen to the tale I'm about to tell, hell  
__We don't gotta trade our shoes, and you ain't gotta walk no thousand miles_

The lyrics continued on. The other Titans were actually clapping their hands to the beat. It was an amazing sight to see. But not everyone was feeling the groove…

Raven stood in silence. The last verse of lyrics had hit in a way that nothing ever had before. These lyrics, this pain, it wasn't all about BB. She understood why the song had drawn her so closely. The pain of life, not being able to fit in…he wasn't the only one who had trouble with that. She was sitting in the same boat with him. The only difference was that she had been too blind to see the truth…

_In my shoes, just to see, what it's like to be me  
__I'll be you, let's trade shoes, just to see what it'd be like to  
__Feel your pain, you feel mine, go inside each others minds  
__Just to see, what we find, look at shit through each others eyes  
__But don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you  
__Don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you_

A sea of emotions was welling up deep inside Raven. She really hadn't expected a song to hit her in such a soft place, but the words meant more to her than the others might have realized. She had spent many years alone, trying to push out any outside contacts for fear that they would one day leave her, desert her when she needed them the most…

_Nobody asked for life to deal us with these bullshit hands we're dealt  
__We gotta take these cards ourselves, and flip them, don't expect no help  
__Now I coulda either just sat on my ass, and pissed and moaned  
__Or take this situation in which I'm placed in, and get up and get my own  
__I was never the type of kid to wait by the door and pack his bags  
__Or sat on the porch and hoped and prayed for a dad to show up who never did  
__I just wanted to fit in in every single place, every school I went  
__I dreamed of being that cool kid even if it meant acting stupid  
__Aunt Edna always told me, keep making that face til it gets stuck like that  
__Meanwhile I'm just standing there holding my tongue, tryna talk like BLEGH!  
__Then I stuck my tongue on that frozen stop sign pole at eight years old  
__I learned my lesson then, 'cause I wasn't trying to impress my friends no more  
__But I already told you my whole life story, not just based off my description  
__Cause where you see it from where you're sitting, is probably 110% different  
__I guess we would have to walk a miles in each others shoes at least  
__What size you wear, I wear 10's, let's see if you can fit your feet_

_In my shoes, just to see, what it's like to be me  
__I'll be you, let's trade shoes, just to see what it'd be like to  
__Feel your pain, you feel mine, go inside each others minds  
__Just to see, what we find, look at shit through each others eyes  
__But don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you  
__Don't let them say you ain't beautiful  
__They can all get fucked, just stay true to you_

Raven stood quietly in the doorway, her eyes filled with tears. Those words had struck her in a way she couldn't describe. Did Beast Boy know her better than he had let on? Could he see the pain that ached in her heart everyday, the pain of being the odd one out? Maybe she had more in common with him than she ever would have guessed.

_Lately I've been hard to reach  
__I've been too long on my own  
__Everybody has a private world  
__Where they can be alone  
__Are you calling me?  
__Are you trying to get through?  
__Are you reaching out for me?  
__I'm reaching out for you…_

The Titans cheered as BB ended his set.

"Dude, that was awe-SOME!" Cyborg said, clapping his hands. "Encore! Encore!"

"I agree!" Starfire said, smiling. "Please, do some more!"

Robin let out a laugh. "I gotta admit, BB," he said, grinning, "You surprised me with that one."

As the shape shifter basked in the spotlight, he looked back towards the doorway. His smile faded as he realized that Raven was gone.

"Dudes, you guys go on without me for a minute, okay?" he said, putting the microphone down on the coffee table.

Without waiting for a reply, BB headed out the door, leaving the other Titans rather stunned.

"Hey, where's he headed off to?" Cyborg asked, puzzled.

Robin sighed. He knew what those words had meant, and who he had meant them for. Now the only question was whether or not she had appreciated them.

* * *

As the moon rose high into the night sky, Raven sat on the edge of the Titan Tower's roof. Her cloak was pulled tightly around her, barring the cold from permeating her body. Her mind was on overload, wondering why BB had chosen that particular song to play. He could have sung any song he wanted and dedicated it to her. Leave it to him to choose the one that would make her emotional.

"Raven, are you up here?" Beast Boy's voice called out from the rooftop. Scanning the roof, he saw the young girl sitting at the edge.

"Hey, here you are," he said, swinging his feet out over the ledge as he sat down. "Are you alright?"

"I guess I am," Raven said, quietly. "Or not. I really don't know."

BB's brow furrowed as he looked at his friend. "You wanna talk about it?"

Raven looked up at him, a slight smile on her face. "Not really," she said, "but thanks for the offer."

"It what I'm here for," the boy said, smiling back.

The two sat in silence for a moment.

"BB, where in the world did that song come from?" the girl asked.

Beast Boy shrugged his shoulders. "It's from Eminem," he said, thoughtfully. "You know, it took me almost a week to memorize the lyrics and get the speed down right?"

Raven looked back at him, a smirk on her face. "You planned this, didn't you?" she asked.

The boy shrugged his shoulders again sheepishly. "You got me," he said, quietly. "I just figured that if I were to sing a song to you, it should be one that has some kind of value, you know? Not just any old song, but something with meaning." He sighed, and looked back into her eyes. "Did you like it?"

Raven bowed her head and closed her eyes, smiling as she did so. "Yeah," she said, slowly, "but if I were you, I'd make sure I never hear the real song unless you want me to point out how bad yours was by comparison."

The two Titans shared a laugh. Slowly, Beast Boy wrapped an arm around Raven's shoulder, pulling her closer to him.

"You feel like going inside and trying out a few songs?" he asked.

"Are you gonna sing another tearjerker?" Raven asked, playfully.

"Nah, probably something that'll annoy everybody," BB said with a grin.

"That sounds more like it," the girl said, returning the grin.

As the two Titans stepped back inside, Raven knew that, even if her friends didn't always understand her, they would always be there for her. She also knew that there was at least one person in the Tower who would understand what she went through…even if he was a pain at times.

* * *

The Titans sat on the couch, intently waiting as Raven shuffled through the playlist looking for something that she could sing. As the playlist came to a stop, she smiled as she chose her own song to try out. Whether or not she butchered it herself remained to be seen, but at least she would have something in common with her friends.

As her lips opened, the Girl from Azareth knew that, for better or worse, this was her life. These were her friends, and they would be there for her until the end. In her mind, all of this was just…beautiful.

THE END


End file.
